The realities of planning a wedding are not always pretty. Planning means decisions, and decisions mean deliberation. Deliberating as a pair may sometimes incur chaos.
It used to be common to hear of the groom taking little interest in the planning process, but it is refreshing when you find out the man wants to be involved. Dan is 100% wanting to be part of every decision that needs to be made – and while he is happy for me to fill my Pinterest boards and do the creative research, he will undoubtedly put his two cent in and flip any ideas on their head. He makes me think of things differently and move my ideas forward – and even though it can prove frustrating at the time, its actually very productive. Not only would planning our wedding by myself prove difficult due to my inability to make decisions alone, it also wouldn’t be as fun as doing it together. By merging ideas, we can create something together that we can both be proud of when we present it to all our loved ones. No matter how lovely that sentiment is, it doesn’t mean it comes without its difficulties. I consider myself lucky that my fiancé wants to be as involved as I am, but like I said, planning a wedding together is not always pretty.
I would like to place an extract from Love My Dress here, as it sums it all up perfectly.
MYTH 7 – GUYS AREN’T INTERESTED IN WEDDING PLANNING
In some cases, this myth can be a shade of the truth but this certainly isn’t an across the board truth. Far from it. The reality is that many guys want to get involved with wedding planning, and whilst they might not want to spend time on Pinterest or blogs falling in love with dresses and details in the same way that you might, this doesn’t mean they’re not interested in planning, they just don’t love some bits in the same way that you do. So, this is a conversation that you need to have right from the outset with your partner. You need to talk through the planning process and find out what interests them, what they want to take responsibility for and what they want to be involved with. Perhaps this myth has grown because some guys just aren’t given the opportunity to be interested in wedding planning! Men are not genetically programmed to hate wedding planning so please don’t leave them out!
If you are really passionate about an idea and your other half doesn’t think the same, it can hurt. You will become defensive and subsequently mock the ones they bring to the table. But when you both agree on something, it is victorious. So celebrate!
The last time we made a decision regarding our wedding, Dan claimed that ‘we can’t celebrate every time we make a decision’. The number of things which need to be decided on will run into the hundreds, but when every decision made has gone through a gruelling elimination process, how can you not reward your progress? A decision for your wedding will always be a big one, whether it’s the little details or the game-changing events.